[size=1880adecf]New Coordinator, Same Old Song in Vegas[/size80adecf]

<img src="http://i63.photobucket.com/albums/h145/ ... ><br><span class="GoTWImageCaption">New faces, same disgraces</span>

Following a restraining order from the CFL's home office (stemming from an incident last year involving a young reporter, his underwear, and a trash can Part I|Part II) today's news conference was held in the Las Vegas training facility via closed circuit TV cameras.

TurfToe appeared calm behind his desk, wearing a plain white t-shirt with 'Missed Short' in bold black lettering. TurfToe announced the hiring of new Defensive Coordinator Sammie Kohn.

"It's with great sadness that I have to announce the departure of our Defensive Coordinator Donald Dawud. Oh, by the way, Donald, if you haven't checked your voice mail yet, I'd like to say we're sorry you had to go. Donald was responsible for putting some great players in position to make some great plays for us the past couple of years. Things change, especially coordinators. After informing Coach Titone of our decision to release Dawud, we agreed on a perfect replacement. It is with great pleasure to announce to our great fandom, our new Defensive Coordinator, Sammie Kohn! Sammie brings some agression to our defensive backfield and has proven success with coaching younger athletes. Our 3-4 defense just wasn't cutting it. Dawud's change to the 3-4 is taking the blunt of the criticism for the large amount of yards and points allowed in 2011 and it's now Sammie's job to fix. We are sure he is up to the task."

TurfToe rambled on about how well Titone did in his first year and the expectations he has for the Vegas club in 2012. As he worked himself up and became the excitable soul he usually is, TurfToe reminded us why this press conference was conducted through closed circuit TV. While ripping off his "Missed Short" t-shirt and jumping over the desk, staring in the camera, rainbow hair flailing in the breeze of his own hot air, TurfToe continued,

[img80adecf]http://i63.photobucket.com/albums/h145/ ... gt/TT4.jpg[/img80adecf]

"Savoy missed short last year and that won't be tolerated. The Rounders, as a professional organization, refuse to let any effort fall short! We will continue to work towards our goal, as a team - to the man, whether on the field, on the sideline, or in the coach's box. I will be damned if some boy-chasing, soccer-style, limp-noodled, kicker-not-a-football-player, waste of a uniform is going to determine the success or failure of this franchise. It will not be tolerated, it has not been tolerated, and I am not tolerating it!"

Following the tirade, TurfToe added that nothing else is going to change in Vegas. With that, he whipped out his signature megaphone and began his "Just say 'No' to Toro" chant. After 15 minutes, we figured that's all he had left to say and concluded the press conference.

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ROF Division Champions: 2039 - 2043, 2045, 2047, 2054, 2056 - 2060, 2063, 2066-2067, 2070-2072
WFC Conference Champions: 2018, 2041, 2042, 2057-2058, 2060, 2062-2063
CFL Champions: 2018, 2041, 2057-2058, 2060, 2062